Thursday, August 31, 2006
Laugh Out Loud!!!!!!
Girlfriend: And are you sure you love me and no one else?
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday
Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?
Manager: Sorry, but i can't give u a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!!
Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?
Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did, I've still got mine with me!
Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can keep it.
Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday
Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?
Manager: Sorry, but i can't give u a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't be of much help anyway!!
Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?
Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did, I've still got mine with me!
Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can keep it.
Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!
Wednesday, August 30, 2006
GCF: Old Maserati
I was living in the mountains above Denver when my college buddy, Gary, arrived in his ancient Maserati sports car. He had just driven it from Ohio, and as he pulled into my driveway, the car broke down.
Calls to auto-supply houses and garages in search of replacement parts proved futile. The 1962 model was simply too rare. Responses ranged from "Mas-a-what? " to "You've got to be kidding." One guy just laughed.
I was at the end of the listings in the Yellow Pages when I dialed Victor's Garage. "Vic," I said, "you're my last hope. Do you carry any parts for a 1962 Maserati?"
There was a long pause. Finally, Victor cleared his throat. "Yes," he replied. "Oil."
Calls to auto-supply houses and garages in search of replacement parts proved futile. The 1962 model was simply too rare. Responses ranged from "Mas-a-what? " to "You've got to be kidding." One guy just laughed.
I was at the end of the listings in the Yellow Pages when I dialed Victor's Garage. "Vic," I said, "you're my last hope. Do you carry any parts for a 1962 Maserati?"
There was a long pause. Finally, Victor cleared his throat. "Yes," he replied. "Oil."
Monday, August 28, 2006
Who is Boss?
When the body was first made, all the parts wanted to be Boss.
The Brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions."
The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."
The hands said, "We should be Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money."
And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.
All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole beingthe Boss.
Sothe asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the Feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
Eventually they all decided that asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!
Management Lesson:
You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.
The Brain said, "I should be Boss because I control the whole body's responses and functions."
The feet said, "We should be Boss as we carry the brain about and get him to where he wants to go."
The hands said, "We should be Boss because we do all the work and earn all the money."
And so it went on and on with the heart, the lungs and the eyes until finally the asshole spoke up.
All the parts laughed at the idea of the asshole beingthe Boss.
Sothe asshole went on strike, blocked itself up and refused to work.
Within a short time the eyes became crossed, the hands clenched, the Feet twitched, the heart and lungs began to panic and the brain fevered.
Eventually they all decided that asshole should be the Boss, so the motion was passed.
All the other parts did all the work while the Boss just sat and passed out the shit!
Management Lesson:
You don't need brains to be a Boss - any asshole will do.
Saturday, August 26, 2006
7 Steps to Take Control of Your Life
Taking control of your life is getting in touch with your values, setting meaningful goals and identifying your vision. To be in control of where life is taking you means being more productive, dealing more effectively with stress, having the ability to solve problems, handing change and developing healthy optimism. Start with these 7 steps and you are on your way.
Do you know whose this...??
A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee.....
On his first day, he dialed the kitchen and shouted into the phone:
"Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"
The voice from the other side responded:
"You fool; you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?"
"No" replied the trainee.
"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"
The trainee shouted back: "And do you know who YOU are talking to,you IDIOT?"
"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.
"Thank God!" replied the trainee and put down the phone.
On his first day, he dialed the kitchen and shouted into the phone:
"Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"
The voice from the other side responded:
"You fool; you've dialed the wrong extension! Do you know who you're talking to?"
"No" replied the trainee.
"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"
The trainee shouted back: "And do you know who YOU are talking to,you IDIOT?"
"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.
"Thank God!" replied the trainee and put down the phone.
Wednesday, August 23, 2006
Sex is Good Exercise!
It has been known for many years that sex is good exercise, but until recently nobody had made a scientific study of the caloric expenditure of different sexual activities. Now after original and proprietary research they are proud to present the results.
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................... 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A PROPHYLACTIC:
With an erection....................... 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris............ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary............................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................ 326 Calories
Italian chandelier..................... 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years old........................ 36 Calories
30-39 years............................ 80 Calories
40-49 years............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years............................ 2916 Calories
70 and over......................... Results are still pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door.... 3521 Calories
REMOVING HER CLOTHES:
With her consent....................... 12 Calories
Without her consent.................... 187 Calories
OPENING HER BRA:
With both hands........................ 8 Calories
With one hand.......................... 12 Calories
With your teeth........................ 85 Calories
PUTTING ON A PROPHYLACTIC:
With an erection....................... 6 Calories
Without an erection.................... 315 Calories
PRELIMINARIES:
Trying to find the clitoris............ 8 Calories
Trying to find the G-Spot.............. 92 Calories
POSITIONS:
Missionary............................. 12 Calories
69 lying down.......................... 78 Calories
69 standing up......................... 112 Calories
Wheelbarrow............................ 216 Calories
Doggy Style............................ 326 Calories
Italian chandelier..................... 912 Calories
ORGASMING:
Real................................... 112 Calories
False.................................. 315 Calories
POST ORGASM:
Lying in bed hugging................... 18 Calories
Getting up immediately................. 36 Calories
Explaining why you got out of bed immediately......816 Calories
GETTING A SECOND ERECTION: If you are:
20-29 years old........................ 36 Calories
30-39 years............................ 80 Calories
40-49 years............................ 124 Calories
50-59 years............................ 972 Calories
60-69 years............................ 2916 Calories
70 and over......................... Results are still pending
DRESSING UP AFTERWARDS:
Calmly................................. 32 Calories
In a hurry............................. 98 Calories
With her father knocking at the door... 1218 Calories
With your wife knocking at the door.... 3521 Calories
Monday, August 21, 2006
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Fifteen Easy Ways to Save Fifteen Bucks
Fifteen dollars isn’t that much, but it’s so easy to make minor adjustments like these, and doing them regularly can mean extra money to go toward debt, emergency savings, investing, or retirement. Some of these tips even let you continue to have a lifestyle that’s far from Spartan.
- If you’re a coffee drinker, brew your own rather than buy it on the run. If you have two cups a day at $1.50 each workday, that’s $60 over a month. You can buy a decent coffee maker, really good bean or ground coffee, and a Stanley stainless steel insulated thermos for about $45 and come out $15 ahead after the first month!
- Switch to water when dining out. Drinks are where restaurants make a killing, and after five dinners with your spouse/SO you’ll be $15 ahead.
- Try some generic brands on your next grocery shopping trip. It’s not hard at all to save $15 on a $100 grocery trip this way.
- Unless the movie absolutely needs to be seen in a theater, wait for it to come out on DVD and rent it. At $18 for two tickets, plus that much for popcorn and drinks, you can save $15 easily. Bonus: no stepping in dried puddles of sugary soda!
- Cancel a magazine that you don’t read anymore. The reduced visual noise is priceless.
- Head to the library rather than buy a new hardcover book in the store. Your mileage may vary depending on how well-stocked your library is. With new hardcovers $20 and up, you can read it for free when your library gets it. Besides, will you read it again?
- Get a $25 dining gift certificate for $10 at Restaurant.com. Your favorite restaurant may be in the network!
- Bring in your lunch for a week. Three dollars a day is doable, and it will probably be healthier.
- Try a water filter instead of bottled water. A Brita pitcher filter will purify about 35 gallons. With bottled water more expensive than gasoline, $15 in savings is a no-brainer.
- Drop extended cable TV service. See if you miss CSPAN2 and the Golf Channel.
- Take your kids to the park for a picnic instead of to Chuck E. Cheese.
- Bring in your snacks instead of feeding the vending machines. Depending on how much you normally eat at work you could save $15 in a couple of weeks.
- Visit a thrift store. People give away some really nice stuff! We got a bread machine for $5 that I know cost more than $20 new.
- Eliminate a couple of trips into town by planning ahead a little. $15 in gas is only about 100-150 miles now.
- Don’t buy flowers on your wedding anniversary. Just kidding on this one — sometimes saving $15 is very costly!!
Friday, August 11, 2006
Tips to Overcome Fear of Public Speaking
Do your knees feel like Gumby's when you have to get up and speak in front of a group? Do you feel like the next words out of your mouth are going to be the dumbest words ever uttered by a human?
Over 41% of people have some fear or anxiety dealing with speaking in front of groups. People who have this fear can experience all kinds of symptoms: Sweaty palms, accelerated heart rate, memory loss and even difficulty in breathing.
Everyone, even experienced speakers, has some anxiety when speaking in front of a group of people. This is perfectly normal. The best way to deal with this anxiety is to first acknowledge that this fear is perfectly normal and you are not alone. To reduce your fear, you need to make sure you properly and thoroughly prepare yourself before you speak. Proper preparation and rehearsal can help to reduce this fear by about 75%. Proper breathing techniques can further reduce this fear by another 15%. Your mental state accounts for the remaining 10%.
Few suggestions you should use to overcome your speaking anxiety. The first and most important of all is preparation. I like to think of it as the 9 P's: Prior Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance of the Person Putting on the Presentation.
10 steps you can take to reduce your speech anxiety.
1. Know the room - become familiar with the place in which you will speak. Arrive early and walk around the room including the speaking area.
Walk from where you will be seated to the place where you will be speaking.
2. Know the Audience - If possible, greet some of the audience as they arrive and chat with them. It is easier to speak to a group of friends than to a group of strangers.
3. Know Your Material - If you are not familiar with your material or are uncomfortable with it, your nervousness will increase. Practice your speech or presentation and revise it until you can present it with ease.
4. Learn How to Relax - You can ease tension by doing exercises. Sit comfortable with your back straight. Breathe in slowly, hold your breath for 4 to 5 seconds, then slowly exhale. To relax your facial muscles, open your mouth and eyes wide, then close them tightly.
5. Visualize Yourself Speaking - Imagine yourself walking confidently to the lectern as the audience applauds. Imagine yourself speaking, your voice loud, clear and assured. When you visualize yourself as successful, you will be successful.
6. Realize People Want You To Succeed - All audiences want speakers to be interesting, stimulating, informative and entertaining. They want you to succeed - not fail.
7. Don't apologize For Being Nervous - Most of the time your nervousness does not show at all. If you don't say anything about it, nobody will notice. If you mention your nervousness or apologize for any problems you think you have with your speech, you'll only be calling attention to it. Had you remained silent, your listeners may not have noticed at all.
8. Concentrate on Your Message - not the audience. Your nervous feelings will dissipate if you focus your attention away from your anxieties and concentrate on your message and your audience, not yourself.
9. Turn Nervousness into Positive Energy - the same nervous energy that causes stage fright can be an asset to you. Harness it, and transform it into vitality and enthusiasm.
10. Gain Experience - Experience builds confidence, which is the key to effective speaking. Most beginning speakers find their anxieties decrease after each speech they give.
Over 41% of people have some fear or anxiety dealing with speaking in front of groups. People who have this fear can experience all kinds of symptoms: Sweaty palms, accelerated heart rate, memory loss and even difficulty in breathing.
Everyone, even experienced speakers, has some anxiety when speaking in front of a group of people. This is perfectly normal. The best way to deal with this anxiety is to first acknowledge that this fear is perfectly normal and you are not alone. To reduce your fear, you need to make sure you properly and thoroughly prepare yourself before you speak. Proper preparation and rehearsal can help to reduce this fear by about 75%. Proper breathing techniques can further reduce this fear by another 15%. Your mental state accounts for the remaining 10%.
Few suggestions you should use to overcome your speaking anxiety. The first and most important of all is preparation. I like to think of it as the 9 P's: Prior Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance of the Person Putting on the Presentation.
10 steps you can take to reduce your speech anxiety.
1. Know the room - become familiar with the place in which you will speak. Arrive early and walk around the room including the speaking area.
Walk from where you will be seated to the place where you will be speaking.
2. Know the Audience - If possible, greet some of the audience as they arrive and chat with them. It is easier to speak to a group of friends than to a group of strangers.
3. Know Your Material - If you are not familiar with your material or are uncomfortable with it, your nervousness will increase. Practice your speech or presentation and revise it until you can present it with ease.
4. Learn How to Relax - You can ease tension by doing exercises. Sit comfortable with your back straight. Breathe in slowly, hold your breath for 4 to 5 seconds, then slowly exhale. To relax your facial muscles, open your mouth and eyes wide, then close them tightly.
5. Visualize Yourself Speaking - Imagine yourself walking confidently to the lectern as the audience applauds. Imagine yourself speaking, your voice loud, clear and assured. When you visualize yourself as successful, you will be successful.
6. Realize People Want You To Succeed - All audiences want speakers to be interesting, stimulating, informative and entertaining. They want you to succeed - not fail.
7. Don't apologize For Being Nervous - Most of the time your nervousness does not show at all. If you don't say anything about it, nobody will notice. If you mention your nervousness or apologize for any problems you think you have with your speech, you'll only be calling attention to it. Had you remained silent, your listeners may not have noticed at all.
8. Concentrate on Your Message - not the audience. Your nervous feelings will dissipate if you focus your attention away from your anxieties and concentrate on your message and your audience, not yourself.
9. Turn Nervousness into Positive Energy - the same nervous energy that causes stage fright can be an asset to you. Harness it, and transform it into vitality and enthusiasm.
10. Gain Experience - Experience builds confidence, which is the key to effective speaking. Most beginning speakers find their anxieties decrease after each speech they give.
Read more useful advices
Ultimate Divorce Letter
Dear Husband
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell.
Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your
favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.
You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Your Ex-wife
***********************
Dear Ex-Wife
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica .
But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.
I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good woman to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell.
Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw. Last week, you came home and didn't notice that I had gotten my hair and nails done, cooked your
favorite meal and even wore a brand new negligee.
You came home and ate in two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching the game. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't touch me or anything Either you're cheating or you don't love me anymore, whatever the case is, I'm gone.
P.S. If you're trying to find me, don't. Your BROTHER and I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!
Your Ex-wife
***********************
Dear Ex-Wife
Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a good woman is a far cry from what you've been. I watch sports so much to try to drown out your constant nagging. Too bad that doesn't work. I did notice when you cut off all of your hair last week, the first thing that came to mind was "You look just like a man!" My mother raised me to not say anything if you can't say anything nice. When you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY BROTHER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago. I went to sleep on you when you had on that new negligee because the price tag was still on it. I prayed that it was a coincidence that my brother had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your negligee was $49.99.
After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for ten million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Jamaica .
But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the filling life you always wanted. My lawyer said with your letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.
P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but Carl, my brother was born Carla. I hope that's not a problem.
Read more funny stories
The act of unlocking…..
A customer arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up their car, They were told that the keys had been accidentally locked in it.
He went to the service department and found a mechanic, Mr Santa working feverishly to unlock the driver`s side door.
As the customer watched from the passenger`s side, he instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open.
"Hey," he announced to the technician, "It`s open!"
"I know," answered Santa.- "I already got that side."
Read all funny jokes
He went to the service department and found a mechanic, Mr Santa working feverishly to unlock the driver`s side door.
As the customer watched from the passenger`s side, he instinctively tried the door handle and discovered it was open.
"Hey," he announced to the technician, "It`s open!"
"I know," answered Santa.- "I already got that side."
Read all funny jokes
Egypt
Masurbating Problem
Pay rise request
Blonde Joke
Blatant Racism and Sexism!
Bank Robber
Italian Boy Confession
Insights
Bill Gate's to Hell
Tech Support
How Guys Turn Down Girls
New Oxford Dictionary Definition
Hole Lotta Love
A man drives up to a child, and says "Come on, get into the car"
Which Condoms Would You Choose ?
Funny Interesting Facts
By Pat Parker
You've heard about Richard Feynman's Nobel Prize for physics in 1965 and about the cool way he demonstrated on live television the reason for the explosion of the Challenger space shuttle in 1986. But here are a few fantastic facts you may not know about this amazing man.
Q. What can you (probably) do that Feynman never learned how to do?
A. Tell left from right. When he wrote on the board during his lectures, Feynman would sometimes flip up his left hand and look at it. He explained, "I keep forgetting which is right and which is left, but I know that my left hand has two small brown spots on the back of it."
Q. What was one technique Feynman used to help him figure out difficult concepts or theories?
A. Translation. Feynman's father used to read to him from the Encyclopedia Britannica. If, for example, they read about a dinosaur that was 25 feet tall with a six-foot-wide head, his father might translate that description into familiar terms for his son: If the dinosaur stood in their yard, it would be tall enough to put its head through an upper window, but its head would be too wide to fit. Throughout his life, Feynman translated complex ideas into simple examples.
Q. What job, other than physicist, was Feynman offered?
A. Washing machine repair person. When Feynman's washing machine broke, he didn't want to pay $300 to get it fixed. He pulled a seized bearing out of the transmission, took the bearing to a washing machine store, and ordered a new one. The store owner said, "Hey, you look like someone who knows what he's doing. How about a job with me, repairing washing machines?"
Q. On what musical instrument did Feynman like to rock out?
A. Bongo drums. He loved to beat on the bongos. He also liked to draw and to decode Mayan hieroglyphics. (The ancient Maya lived in Mexico. Their written language, a form of hieroglyphics, was a series of pictures and symbols that represented sounds, words, and ideas.)
Q. How did Feynman once describe the movement of atoms?
A. As a group of friends hanging out. In a series of television films for the British Broadcasting Company called Fun to Imagine, he said: "You see a little drop of water, a tiny drop, and the atoms attract each other — they like to be next to each other; they want as many partners as they can get!" He described the atoms on the surface of the water (the "guys at the edge") as unhappy and nervous, constantly trying to get in. Cooling off the water, he said, causes the atoms to get stuck in place. "They like to be with their friends. . . . It's [called] ice."
Q. What was the ultimate reason that Feynman decided to stick with being a physicist after World War II?
A. For the fun of it. After World War II, Feynman had a hard time focusing on his work and began to think that he would never accomplish anything again. So when he was offered a job at the Princeton Institute for Advanced Study, he thought that they were "absolutely insane" to want him. Then, he said, "I suddenly realized, while I was shaving, 'I can't live up to what other people expect me to do.' They expected me to be wonderful to offer me a job like this, and I wasn't wonderful and therefore I realized a new principle: 'I'm not responsible for what other people think I am able to do. I don't have to be good because they think I'm going to be good.' . . .So I decided that I was only going to do things for the fun of it."
Odyssey, Nov2004, Vol. 13
You've heard about Richard Feynman's Nobel Prize for physics in 1965 and about the cool way he demonstrated on live television the reason for the explosion of the Challenger space shuttle in 1986. But here are a few fantastic facts you may not know about this amazing man.
Q. What can you (probably) do that Feynman never learned how to do?
A. Tell left from right. When he wrote on the board during his lectures, Feynman would sometimes flip up his left hand and look at it. He explained, "I keep forgetting which is right and which is left, but I know that my left hand has two small brown spots on the back of it."
Q. What was one technique Feynman used to help him figure out difficult concepts or theories?
A. Translation. Feynman's father used to read to him from the Encyclopedia Britannica. If, for example, they read about a dinosaur that was 25 feet tall with a six-foot-wide head, his father might translate that description into familiar terms for his son: If the dinosaur stood in their yard, it would be tall enough to put its head through an upper window, but its head would be too wide to fit. Throughout his life, Feynman translated complex ideas into simple examples.
Q. What job, other than physicist, was Feynman offered?
A. Washing machine repair person. When Feynman's washing machine broke, he didn't want to pay $300 to get it fixed. He pulled a seized bearing out of the transmission, took the bearing to a washing machine store, and ordered a new one. The store owner said, "Hey, you look like someone who knows what he's doing. How about a job with me, repairing washing machines?"
Q. On what musical instrument did Feynman like to rock out?
A. Bongo drums. He loved to beat on the bongos. He also liked to draw and to decode Mayan hieroglyphics. (The ancient Maya lived in Mexico. Their written language, a form of hieroglyphics, was a series of pictures and symbols that represented sounds, words, and ideas.)
Q. How did Feynman once describe the movement of atoms?
A. As a group of friends hanging out. In a series of television films for the British Broadcasting Company called Fun to Imagine, he said: "You see a little drop of water, a tiny drop, and the atoms attract each other — they like to be next to each other; they want as many partners as they can get!" He described the atoms on the surface of the water (the "guys at the edge") as unhappy and nervous, constantly trying to get in. Cooling off the water, he said, causes the atoms to get stuck in place. "They like to be with their friends. . . . It's [called] ice."
Q. What was the ultimate reason that Feynman decided to stick with being a physicist after World War II?
A. For the fun of it. After World War II, Feynman had a hard time focusing on his work and began to think that he would never accomplish anything again. So when he was offered a job at the Princeton Institute for Advanced Study, he thought that they were "absolutely insane" to want him. Then, he said, "I suddenly realized, while I was shaving, 'I can't live up to what other people expect me to do.' They expected me to be wonderful to offer me a job like this, and I wasn't wonderful and therefore I realized a new principle: 'I'm not responsible for what other people think I am able to do. I don't have to be good because they think I'm going to be good.' . . .So I decided that I was only going to do things for the fun of it."
Odyssey, Nov2004, Vol. 13
Read more interesting facts
Interesting Facts about Arizona
Interesting Facts about Alabama
Interesting Facts about Alaska
Funny Interesting Facts
Interesting Animal Facts
A Few Facts about Animal Bites
World Maps at a Click of The Mouse
Some interesting facts about the Sun
Science Snacks
Surprising Facts About The Body
Saturday, August 05, 2006
Train Trip
A young Technician and his General Manager board a train headed through the mountains on its way to Wichita.
They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother.
After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young tech are interested in each because they are giving each other "looks."
Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound of the smack of a kiss followed by the sound of the smack of a slap.
When the train emerges from the tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word.
The grandmother is thinking to herself: "It was very brash for that young man to kiss my granddaughter, but I'm glad she slapped him."
The General manager is setting there thinking:"I didn't know the young tech was brave enough to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped and hit me!"
The young woman was sitting and thinking: "I'm glad the guy kissed me, but wish my grandmother had not slapped him!"
The young tech sat there with a satisfied smile on his face. He thought to himself: "Life at Boeing is good... How often does a guy have the chance to kiss a beautiful girl and slap his General manager all at the same time!!!
They can find no place to sit except for two seats right across the aisle from a young woman and her grandmother.
After a while, it is obvious that the young woman and the young tech are interested in each because they are giving each other "looks."
Soon the train passes into a tunnel and it is pitch black. There is a sound of the smack of a kiss followed by the sound of the smack of a slap.
When the train emerges from the tunnel, the four sit there without saying a word.
The grandmother is thinking to herself: "It was very brash for that young man to kiss my granddaughter, but I'm glad she slapped him."
The General manager is setting there thinking:"I didn't know the young tech was brave enough to kiss the girl, but I sure wish she hadn't missed him when she slapped and hit me!"
The young woman was sitting and thinking: "I'm glad the guy kissed me, but wish my grandmother had not slapped him!"
The young tech sat there with a satisfied smile on his face. He thought to himself: "Life at Boeing is good... How often does a guy have the chance to kiss a beautiful girl and slap his General manager all at the same time!!!
Lol
But not in the way that you think...
One day...
Lawyer Joke
You were not involved
Keep Your Motor Running!
How To Deal with Telemarketers
Santa & banta are back
Really Funny SMS text message Jokes
Little Bob
Baptist Joke
You Know You're Too Hi-Tech If
Superman
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barm...
It's a Woman Thing...
Train trip
But not in the way that you think...
One day...
Lawyer Joke
You were not involved
Keep Your Motor Running!
How To Deal with Telemarketers
Santa & banta are back
Really Funny SMS text message Jokes
Little Bob
Baptist Joke
You Know You're Too Hi-Tech If
Superman
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barm...
It's a Woman Thing...
Train trip
The Following is a Chinese Good Luck Tantra Totem
You may not believe in this but the advice is great!
Read all the way down, you might learn something!!!
Read all the way down, you might learn something!!!
ONE.
Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
TWO.
Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their
conversational skills will be as important as any other.
THREE.
Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
Must Read
This incident happened recently in North Texas.
A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the refrigerator of the boat. On Monday she was taken to the hospital and placed in the Intensive Care Unit. She died on Wednesday.
The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis. This was traced to the can of coke she drank from, not using a glass. Tests showed that the can was infected by dried rat urine and hence the disease Leptospirosis.
Rat urine contains toxic and deathly substances. It is highly recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of soda cans before drinking out of them The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported straight to the shops without being cleaned.
A study at NYCU showed that the tops of soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i.e).. full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water before putting them to the mouth to avoid any kind of fatal accident.
Please forward this message to all the people you care about.
(I JUST DID)
A woman went boating one Sunday taking with her some cans of coke which she put into the refrigerator of the boat. On Monday she was taken to the hospital and placed in the Intensive Care Unit. She died on Wednesday.
The autopsy concluded she died of Leptospirosis. This was traced to the can of coke she drank from, not using a glass. Tests showed that the can was infected by dried rat urine and hence the disease Leptospirosis.
Rat urine contains toxic and deathly substances. It is highly recommended to thoroughly wash the upper part of soda cans before drinking out of them The cans are typically stocked in warehouses and transported straight to the shops without being cleaned.
A study at NYCU showed that the tops of soda cans are more contaminated than public toilets (i.e).. full of germs and bacteria. So wash them with water before putting them to the mouth to avoid any kind of fatal accident.
Please forward this message to all the people you care about.
(I JUST DID)
Main Menu
- Vaty Home
- Hot Pics
- Joke of the Day
- Short Stories
- Useful Advice
- Interesting Facts
- Funny Animals
- Fashion
- Celebrities
- Questions & Answers
Previous Posts
- Joke of the Day
- Interesting Facts about Futuristic Designs
- Toughest Time
- A Good Husband's Guide
- Have you ever seen a frozen sea?
- Funny Short Jokes
- Operation
- Mind Blowing Facts
- Animatronics
- Too Good
Archives
Links
- www.st0ries.com
- nicevice.net
- komplexov.net
- mezack.blogspot.com
- photo-a-day.blogspot.com
- thenewsboy.blogspot.com
- very-funny-pictures.blogspot.com
